ArOnIL

This has a much been discussed topic here and there in forums and other circles of people engaging in discussion. Just came back from the movie yesterday and guess what i watched... yes of course Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.

Personally, I loved the storyline for I find it beautiful and has many principles which i agree with. Base on our master Lewis's background we know that the Narnia storyline in book two is rather much an allegory of how Jesus Christ gave up his life for our salvation but in a fairy tale manner. Lewis wanted so much to spread this good news and he did so through the passion of writing. And for that, his works are still being studied and they still touch peoples hearts. Hehehe one can write a whole thesis on him. I recommend so much the first book of Narnia:The Magician's Nephew. See the similarity of the creation of the world in The Silmarillion, which is also an allegory of the book of Genesis. Genius, absolute genius and beautiful.

However I'm unfortunately disappointed with how the movie was produced. The movie in my rating was just ok..not the WOW factor like Lord of The Rings.I just don't think that the movie captured the full essence of the message C.S.Lewis wanted to portray out there. Or maybe it is because of the fantasy and magical elements that were playd out so much in the movie that it has become a little bit off. Either that or maybe LOTR has given the movie business too much to beat now. The casting was right on the spot, they got good actors and Liam Neesan (Quigon-Jin) was perfect as Aslan. A deep commanding yet fatherly like voice...wonder if Sean Connery would've also been good. Little Lucy was superb and played her character well, all the acctors did. And Jadis.. my my.. she was cold!

Now Lord of The Rings, is still the movie of all movies...to me ^_^ anyway. Storyline is fantastic without a doubt, even without the movie to make it even more fantastic. Movie is also undeniably fantastic. I'm running low on vocabulary here. The book and the movie just make me speechless, especially the Silmarillion!

Now as for Harry Potter, unfortunately as much as some people would disagree that it is a good book. I have to say that Rowling knew what she was writing and she gave her audience what she wanted. Goes the same for the movie. Interesting though that none of the HP books was ever in a bright environment, plot was anyway. I might even go as far as to actually suggest it could be a gothic novel, cause of how dark it is at times. The HP books definately clash with most of my principles, the point of magic for instance in this manner (that's a different story and different argument altogether). What I don't like is, if one thinks about it, when you have magic, there is practically no point in anything anymore and the concept of who has the most power is the one in control. Magic makes things happen easily and that is when one does not learn anything in my opinion. You won't learn if things come easily your way. My opinion, feel free discuss ^_~.

Anyway conclusion is that these three stories meet in the fantasy world. And movie critique wise, I'd give LOTR first followed by Narnia and HP(as an overall until movie 5). However i think that movie 5 of HP is unfortunately better than narnia, emphasis on movie wise, not book or overall!

But do go catch Narnia, it's very worth the watch and even more so if you can see the hidden allegory in Narnia. Truely a beautiful beautiful movie and i completely and utterly recommend the soundtrack!!!! I'm sorry Howards Shore but it actually beats some of your LOTR music.

As the title suggests itself, it can be considered as an inward reflection on oneself that directly questions ones principles and priorities. For those who have me on their msn, they would've notice this on my nick for quite sometime.. ok fine at least a few weeks.

There was a point in time when i was gung-ho and very intense and disciplined with my diet and my workouts. I still am, but every once in a while they can slip and that is when the first slip is let out that everything can sometimes go terribly of the right regime.Instead of eating healthily, other junk foods come up as a craving, they do of course at times but its when you train the stomach, tongue and most importantly your mentality that you can shoo away those thoughts of greed.

Same also goes for a workout regime. The first time you start of a workout it always feels good. For you have the adrenaline to fuel your workout, the sweat pouring down your head, the feel of the burning of fat, the ache in your muscles that tell you your are really doing it right and finally the satisfied feeling after a workout.where one can just go...ahhhhhhh!! Only my workout buddies will agree with me on this ^_~ hehehe... It's complete ecstacy, to have that satisfaction. For what you have done is taken your body to its maximum peak, where you push yourself to be something that you want to attain.

However, when the body or the mind gets even the slightest bit lazy, one day may just past without a workout. Then slowly another and another..and finally you find you are at stage zero again trying to motivate yourself. Then it becomes a bummer. Your muscles shrink, and since there is lacking of muscle mass, metabolism starts to reduce which means less fat is being burnt, and then the fat tissues take over.

Now overall as much as this is very physical, I origrinally wrote this down because of how it also fits much with our spirituality, especially our walk of faith into God's path. There are times when we make a commitment to God at the beginning and we are very fervent and passionate with that motivation. But then after a bit, we tend to fall out. And it is when we have that slip, that there are two paths. One we actually are aware of it and do something about it. Second,we are aware of it and we choose to deny all of it and not do a thing.

Sports and working out is not just meant for those with cash, those who are jocks. But for all, you don't need a gym to keep fit. You can do it with the right amount of research and with the right mentality. It's up to you to maintain it.

Spirituality with God also needs to be maintained, and it is a discpline in itself, to motivate oneself with consistent passion and prayer. God's flame in your heart won't die out, He is there indefinately, but when chosen not to be acknowledge becomes a story of tragedy and death. To lose out in God's ways is the saddest thing. Just like how one may not be please with their physique today for they know they can be better, applies in the same manner here. Your spiritual growth is just like a muscle that has to be consistently trained and maintained. You slip once, it takes a long while to get back to where you once were. So don't slip to far.

Everything is discipline...What is yours?

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.
- 1 Corinthians 9:24-25

You know after much reading on Beloved by Toni Morrison, one actually ends up loving the book, even though it maybe rather gothic, and holds no particular historical relevance to asian context. But it does prove very much a worthy read and what one can learn about accepting social pasts. Basicaly that whole novel is a slave narrative that is base on a true story of a mother who loved her children so much, that she was willing to do anything to keep them from the clutches of slavery. Even murdering them and herself.

You know how when a past that has happened to you or somebody else affects you greatly. And half the time it doesn't go away.. the nagging lingering feeling of the past still haunting you. According to Beloved, there are two manners of settling a past the unhealthy way. One is the method of ignoring it completely, and possibly denying it. This could end up with a very hardened heart and mentality, where in the end one will never permit discussion of the topic or even a thought about it. Second method, is actually letting the past bother you so much till you live it in your present time. The person then reembodies the past and in the end will suffer from depression, or of some sort of situation which just gets them sunk deeper and deeper into the past. That to come out of it soon becomes difficult.

Basically the point i want to iterate here, is the fact that a past no matter how bad can never change. It will always be as it were, and there is no point crying over the spilt milk of a past. The only way of getting through it is to relook at it perhaps and overcome it. How? There are so many ways. It hurts very much when a past overwhelms you till even the meer thought of it can cause a tear to the idea (in reference to bad memories). But when a past resurfaces and you feel the emotion that occurred at that time, does not neccessarily mean that one is not over it? That it still bothers and lingers like a foreign entity in your head?

All memories of course are not bad. But why have a memory? If one never remembers what happened at that point in time, one will never learn, one will never know what it means to have such pain happen. Probably one can also look in perspective as to why bad things happen. There is always the choice of looking at a memory in an optimistic way and a pessimistic way. It depends on how you look at it, that will decide your actions and thoughts of that memory.

My my... it's been pretty long since i have actually put up anythin here... more than a month to be exact...so many thoughts and all of them are unfortunately kept in my head... no wonder i have been going completely mad!

There isn't much possibility of my brain functioning correctly at this hour right now, as it is 1 something in the morning, on top of that i'm trying to cram for the exam which awaits me this coming thursday morning... ugh..

Why i say P.H.D? While using the term Persistant, cause that is basically what the chase for knowledge does to you and at the same time when you force your brain to understand whatever it is that is before you. I've had much that I wanted to draft out here, but sadly forgot most of them.

Nevertheless I still have some rubbish to talk about here.. that might be worthwhile.. your choice, whoever it is that reads. Things have been rather hectic as COSTA, has beome awaken for a particular few weeks followed by a week of dying from stress in that same week, and now everything has to be turned of momentarily till the exam period is finito.

The one thing i love about group work or gathering of any sort that involves people. Is that through working out for an event, you actually get to see the wonders of relationships grow between people. Where once two people or more were strangers that barely ever talked to one another, from just one small working environment you get to at least start of the spark of a 'conversation'... which in due course will take its turn into a friendship.

Another thought about P.H.D. the last day of revision, my head just cracked under the extremely to overly used term CONTEXT!! Basically after much digesting in the head...context makes up everything. Without context you can't understand nuts about what you are reading, or how to even bother making an interpretation out of anything. The other head boggling thing was text...what is text:? Text is anything and everything..from what you see, hear, smell and even think! ou would think i have not have lost my sanity right there and then. But you see to read in context here, is not entirely possible cause you would not have known what had gone on that day in the classroom. But to keep it brief, it was a P.H.D.

TO ALL FELLOW MONASHIANS, I WISH YOU AL THE BEST OF LUCK, AND MAY THE POWER OF DISCOURSE BE WITH YOU. Amen

I'm sure everyone at one point in their life has asked at least once to themselves. Where do I come from? How is it I know what I am? How is it i know how to speak to others? How is it I know that thing in front of me is a house,dog, or even me (if you are looking at a mirror)?

Then comes to my second part. What even constitutes us? How is it we know that who we are, we can be considered to be an individual? Aren't i not like everyone else. I breath, talk, walk, eat and feel just like everyone else around me. So what in the world makes me unique? What makes me different from everyone else? Or am I just another copy of another 'thing' or 'subject'? Or am I merely made up of other copies and i just choose what i want from those others in order to form my own individualism? Are we just clones?

I ramble a lot...

Or can we say that we are different not because of our physicalities but because of the way we think. The way our minds work and associate things as they are. The fact of having an opinion of my own. Does that make me an individual?

My fellow individuals...shall we just share what we think an individual is? How society has categorized what an individual is? Or more so...How God has created the human being called the individual?

That's enough of my ramble...

Ok now.. this may seem highly wrong.. but i'm sharing the wealth. For those who want an increase in hotmail account space this is it. I know there are tips to increase it further... but haven't found it yet, darn...Anyway be happy with the increased space. Do tell me if it works for you.

BTW.... for those using MSN email yours will increase to 2000mb...but sadly for hotmail users like me.. only 250mb...oh well.

Increase your Hotmail account to 250 MB

i tried and it works !!

Steps

Login ur hotmail account and go to options.
Go to "Personal"
Click "My Profile"
Change Country to "United States"
Wait for browser to load United states settings.
Change the state to "Florida" and zip code "33332"
Click "update"
Click "Continue"
Go to "Language" and make sure its "English"
Paste this link in the same browser.
http://by17fd.bay17.hotmail.msn.com/cgi-bin/Accountclose

Wait until the Screen says you're Hotmail is Closed and ready to be deleted.
Click "Close Account".
Go back to login page and relogin to ur hotmail account..!!

Your account size will now increase to 25 MB which a month later becomes 250 mb.

"An ideology always exist in an apparatus and so does its practices. This existence is material."
- Louis Althusser

Exactly what it states.....
A doodle...

After doing much reading about idealism and materialism, not to mention other horrid books, you end up asking yourself after a while where does my consciousness actually originate from? You then start asking yourself questions, because there seems to be some confusion if not truth in what you read. Can you trust your own consciousness? How do the thoughts in your head make something real? How real is real? Is everything a facade, some illusion that is just to hide some hidden reality.. ie=Matrix, Plato's Cave, 'The island' hologram...?

Your consciousness idealisticly, comes from somewhere beyond the human realm. It is of a higher understanding which one is not able to attain through physical means. It is an external 'thing' that is somehow within us. What is it? Who is it?

Or is our consciousness socially constructed from the places we are placed in, the people we hang out with, the multitude forms of text we receive? So if we are placed in an island with nothing else but animals, do we then become an animal too? Do we lose all thought of any humanity that is within us? Or if we are placed in an entirely educated and sophisticated environment, are we also going to turn out to be just like the rest, supposedly smart, posh and snobbish, without a care in the world?
Do our surroundings really constitute for the nature of our thoughts?

Or do you think it is a combination of both? OUr consciousness is derived from something internally within us and also externally, which i would like to call the institutions we are in and our... oh forbid... 'culture' and of course not forgetting. The One who even put a soul in our very cheap casing of a shell which is to complex to even comprehend, the body....The Almighty God.

When you also think about it. It is such an amazing thing, the human organism, how we function, each part of our body has a purpose. But even more amazing is how we have our own mind to think and act. I don't think anyone can comprehend or even being to try thinking how God created such a thing as consciousness. It is beyond the capacity of human understanding, it is can be seen as an 'event horizon'.

Ok to make it clear first, this is reagarding education... to be more specific, what I am studying in Monash, which is under the category of mass communication.

You know, whoever that actually said mass comm, is suppose to be easy, seriously never took it. Or more so, never took up what we learn here. When entering uni, us students didn't really bargain on what we were going to learn. Unlike Lim Kok Wing, One Academy and what not that actually teaches a different type of mass comm altogether. Monash specializes very much so in theories. Which comes the big word of the day THEORIES and just more and more theories, which can destroy and at the same time enhance my brain.

Some would think, of mass comm, is suppose to be the lower class of the education hierarchy, because its an "Arts" subject. And one doesn't need a degree in order to come out and do mass comm stuff, which is more so media half the time, eg. Tv, Radio broadcasting, Producing and video editing. As much as those seem like fun, we are not doing that here in delightful Monash (which is not all that bad!).

From every subject unit us students take, we have theories shoved into our faces. And all from this wonderful term called post-modernism and post-structuralism. Where we end up learing stuff as, the self is really not really the self, everything we see is just a representation of another thing, we come into the realm of feminism, the pshycoanalytical, cultural studies, sociology. Where we then here not big names of directors and producers such as Steven Spielberg, David Lucas, Alfred Hitchcock, Quentin Tarantino and so on. But you here big names like Althusser, Williams, Marx, Barthes, Foucault and Fraud (uuuughhhh the one i hate the most, because of him i shall forever be scared by his theories of the unconscious.)

We actually have to bother with why a film is done as such (ok fine), we have to bother as to why this person says this and whether his words are tangible, and worst of all, is when the lecturers say "There is no right or wrong, just how you explain it" Sheeeeeeshhh..... all fellow communications say it with me....."Sheesssshhh".

So needless to say, mass comm is not all fun and play, there is work and reading that we do.... or as normal students...try to do....cope to do....fail to do? Whatever it be, mass comm is not easy. It is an eye opener, and actually makes one think of things you never would've before....I lay down my peace.

You know there are times when, people put you down and where you put them down. But there are the times when even you will put yourself down. And sometimes that can be hardest pressure you give to yourself. That you just shoot yourself down so bad till it is even lower than the crap that you see at the side of the road. I've listened to many pep talks and what not, but tonight i heard the best one out of my twenty years. And i'm proud that it was given to my dad. It was nothing fancy, no crowd or whatever, but it was just a simple conversation between the family.

Now i admit that i tend not to listen half the time in one of these talks even though my good ol dad, says it out of love and wishes nothing more than to improve his kids. Half the time i'll even say i defend my own state. I don't agree with everything my parents say, but for the first time, in the midst of listening, they made the most sense and it spoke something for me.

States of depression come at least once in a persons life. It's a human thing and it will come. For those who don't ever have them they are blessed amazingly in my eyes. For they don't go through the stages of crying and moping. But in anycase, this story simply begins with the fact that a person shot themself down to the point of picking themselves up was completely impossible. Two theories, either bad experience caused the shooting of one's confidence, or they have been fed with extremely negative points countlessly over again, that it finally seeped in and just crushed them.

Either way or however else it may have happened. The person took all they have done or worked for to achieve, for granted. It doesn't matter where or what, but the person gave all they could for the goal they were trying to achieve. But after hearing much on what they have means so little, person finally thought they are nothing short of a failure, a useless hopeless bag, with too much self pity for themself. With those thoughts implanted in, they come to the stage of where they can't care anymore, there is no point, they can't do it, it's a complete waste, cause they are just going to be shot down again.

Then along came a talk, a talk that said to not take oneself so short. Even though what they may have done is just a small step of others, they gave it their all at that point in time. The past is past,there is no point moping about the 'glory' days whatever that could mean. They are past, and the world awaits for the persons skills.

So now it is time to step out and face other challenges, to prove that all the skill God has implanted into that person can be made into some use. That it can be use to bless others. I'm just thankful, that God has planted a father who is there for me, and that he bothers enough to bring me out as much as he can out of the slump, in order for me to refocus. God does stuff like this in different ways, but it has never reached my ears or eyes before. I suppose that it comes directly from my blood father, means something. All the more i just want to thank God that he blessed me with this person whom i can call my father.Amen

Can you see the wounds?
Can you see the hurt?
Can you see the scar?
Can you see the suffering?

What do you see?
A world that you once believed in…
Is nothing more than an illusion to your soul…
All that had seem true is like a broken orb

The home you brought up in,
The people who surround you,
The places you went,
The things that you have done,

What have they all meant to you?
What have they all been for?
What was the purpose of it all?
What is the point of keeping them?

The mind is restless,
Too easily amused by the lies of the world,
It receives the lies,
And take them to be true

The eyes and touch of the human,
Fails just as badly,
For it touches and misses what it cannot have,
And destroys what it wishes not to see.

Each tear shed instead of cooling the skin burns instead,
For that is where we are,
Not in our own paradise
But in actual truth our own hell,

What a marvelous deception,
For people to actually think they can redeem themselves,
All supposed works of a man,
Means so little if not nothing in the end…

Riches they think they have now,
Abilities they think they still sustain,
Righteousness they think they should rightly claim,
Happiness they think they have obtained,

All of it is meaningless,
All of it is a painful and despicable lie,
All of it a deception,
All of it is a disgrace.

O God,
With so much of deceit and selfishness in a human,
How is it that You can still love us so?
How is that You have redeemed us so?

Let all man be liars Lord,
And the Truth spoken in You,
For in our midst of deception
You have saved us with your unfailing and merciful grace

Steven Spielberg has done it again. Another, dramatised movie. War of the Worlds, is suitable for all ages and makes one continuously in suspense, and constant thinking of why this and why that. The fact of how a father who does not his kids all that well, kids mostly like to ignore him and all. It was rather touching as to see how the family clung together, or more so how the father tried his utmost best to take care of his kids no matter the cause. The beginning and the ending were quite ingenious to me. I mean you wold not have expected, or to be more precise thought of it, until explained.


*** Attention Spoilers Ahead - Read at own peril ***


The trailer was really misleading, as I original thought it was another movie of human race versus with mother nature who is to fed up with humanity that has destroyed so much of her. But then when you listen to the introduction of the movie, it is actually a movie of earth invaded by aliens. It was a good idea of the publicity people to make sure the audience did not see the alien figure during trailers and only in the movie, leaves mroe of the "I want to know what happen".

Let me first go into cinematography. Camera angles along with special affects were naturally of course always defying logic around that of the hero. You would have a house explode behind our hero Ray and then another one and he is still sturdy on his feet running away from aliens. And of course when other people die from the rays of the aliens and explode into nothing but dust.

The actors were good, especially Tom Cruise and Dakota Fanning, who in my opinion is a star in the making. She played her part perfectly. Come to think of it, most of the movie revolved around these two cast members anyway.

What i just can't stand about the movie is probably the reunion of the family at the end of the movie. It i must agree with some been a better ending for the family scenario if Spielberg had actually made the son die(sorry to say so), also what was the point of the son running up the hill saying "I must see this", the fight between human military and the alien tripods. I still don't get it. And after that explosion immediately as he ran into the battle field, you can tell me he actually survived? I think the son was the dumbest part of the movie, he wanted to play hero and then after that wanted to play Mr. Independent. And then suddenly at the end "Oh Daddy, Oh son". Oh well can't have it all.

Also where i think there was mess up, if not calls for further thinking as it was not explained in the movie was where the aliens who supposedly ahve been watching and monitoring earth all this while, were suppose to be the 'smart' beings and therefore have come to earth to exterminate the human race who thought they were all powerful. But if that is so, why did they not take more precautions when they were actually on the planet. And the ships were already there, so to say that they have never been physically on earth before the invasion would then be wrong. So they should have been able to make sure they would not be affected by whatever diseases, but then again at the earlier part of the earth, there weren't the type of bacterias and microorganisms we have today.

The ending of how the aliens died...this i don't want to put it, but it is purely genius of how it is interlinked through out the whole movie. Still a good movie overall though.

End of my so called critique.

My good people I'll be heading to bangkok for a study trip, and as much as some would like to actually think that Monashians happen to be brats and we are never gonna get any work done, but just lepak when we get to our destination..... Stop being such a discriminator :P ..as much as i can say it is the same for any student in any institution

But just pray that all of us will have a safe flight and that we will have good journey ahead off us. The purpose of the tip is to expose our Malaysian eyes to that of a different culture (duh), learn a bit of the issues that revolves in the country and perhaps become a little more wiser when we get back...(don't know how that would be, but I can be optimistic).

If you wish to be updated about the trip, we will be blogging out our time spent in Bangkok, in this blog.

http://insearchofbangkok.blogsome.com

I know it's been a long while since the Da Vinci Code came out but i finally got down to reading it.
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As my opening to the is entry, author Richard Barber author of 'The Holy Grail: Imagination and Belief' says

"There is history and there is imagination, and imagination doesn't work like history and history doesn't work like imagination."

Fascinating is it not when we hear of a detail in the history line, or even an interesting speculation that seems to be like the truth. That the human kind, when exposed to particular reading material, will consider that source even though it is purely fictional for entertainment purposes, yet somehow looks to have a "hidden", if not applausable truth will naturally take that text as a source which is credible. Even worse, is when the human mind is able to conceive truths of its own, through some sort of interpretation which does not seem all that far fetched to the minds of those in the worldly sphere and claim that to be truth in history.

I personally feel that the point the book claims to be fictional is a controversy as much as his story of the "secret" of Jesus Christ is a controversy. At the beginning of the book, they always have a disclaimer stating how this book, is meant to be purely fictional and any relation to anything in the real world is purely coincidental. Then after that it moves on to a fact page, stating that the Priory of Sion is real, The Vatican is real and that all the secret socities and rituals are also real. If that is so then what is fictional in the book?

If what is stated in the book, really are facts, then Christianity has been nothing short of an illusion, created by those who are supposedly in "higher authority". Also after watching Instinct last night, it can be seen that we always see in this world is sometimes a facade....We only think we are in control, we only think that our actions are deemed higher, we only think we have authority.... but that's another story.

As I was saying, Da Vinci code, worries me with the fact that when people who are non-believers of the faith read it, they will actualyl take it as the truth which is plain well ridiculous. It is sad that the thing that makes the most money, the best-sellers, the things that attract are always that which are controversial and would love to do nothing more than to attack the Christian faith. The Da Vinci code, states that there is a hidden secret that is not knowned by the people, a secret if you ask me, is only made by humans. If really this was such an important part in history, then why not be placed in a doctrine. How can a secret as such be kept silent for years.

The point that there is a possibility that Jesus could have even be married and had a child with Mary Magdelene is preposterous and contradicts with any doctrine that has been passed down to us since the death of Jesus Almighty. The fact that we could have someone from the direct lineage is too much, is it applausable? No.

The book, itself, is not all that fantastic either. The only parts that intrigued me were the puzzles and questions that were trying to be worked out. The characters themselves were not all that fascinating, although i did find Sir Teabing to be amusing at times.

Point here is that, the book, is a controversy, and even Brown himself does not know how to differentiate between fact, myth, fiction and imagination.

I forgot to add....

It is ridiculous to me, how they also like to fuse paganism/new age/worship fo the goddess and so on so forth together with Christianity. The fictional stories people love to just twist our minds with. Take for example in Brown there was a aprt that states, Constantine wanted to bring paganism and christianity together...don't know how much o that is true.. but anyway, there was mention of how it just so happens that christians jsut so happen to worship God on the 7th day, which is a Sunday. and the term 'sun' actually is derived from worshipping the sun god.

Sigh this reminds me much of a movie i watched called 'Mists of Avalon', King Arthur fable of course together along with magic. When magic died according to that movie, the priestesses who worshipped the goddess was no more and neither was she.. but then it just so happens that the worshipping of the Virgin Mary is the one where everyone turns to...and their conclusion is that the goddess is still alive.. in the mother Mary.... ai ai...

oh well i'm done here.

I am not generalising here but i am just making a point of how "some" communities, social groups and so on are.
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As all knows, due to migration, practically nearly most countries can be considered multicultural nowadays. They will have the Asians, Eurasian, Caucasions, Africans and so on so forth. All with different background and different languages of their own.

Basically this comes ot he point i wish to blog about. The chinese who is yet not a chinese? The asians who can't speak their native tongue. A banana as one is called for the chinese, Yellow on the outside (chinese skin colour) and white ont he inside (the white man's skin). You also have the coconut which is in reference to the Indian who can't speak their native language...you take a guess at the nickname coconut and see the symbolism of the meaning.

Yes it is a disadvantage to only be able to speak one language so to speak...following a stupid PR joke on language. "If you can speak three languages you are trilingual, if you can speak only two then you are bilingual, and if you can only speak one language, well then you are American..."

I found that joke, funny and at the same time offensive. Allow me to elaborate. Firstly it is naturally funny if you would take a look at some of the truths of it, i think in the American society, they dont' really speak anything but English. However it can't be so over here in our asian region. It is a necessity to at least know how to speak more than the English language.
Now what i find offensive is when, the unfortunate Asians who can't speak anything but the English, they are considered wannabes.

Look at it this way, Chinese individual who can only speak English or Chinese. In your own home country if you speak only English some will look down on you, as if you are some kind of traitor to your own culture. Is it the person's fault for being brought up in an english education and surrounded by people and media that speak as such? Some asians diss their own chinese brother or sister, mock them, poke at them, think of them as posh snobs and even worse "wannabe's" of the Western culture for speaking only English.

Granted not all shun the "banana" in the community. But even so, it is sad. Then again it can also be turned around to how the english educated will thne only look for groups and friends that can speak the same language as them. I suppose that will make them look snobby in the end. Why is acceptance of others such a requirement sometimes? Sigh the vice versa of it all.

.. i shall never make it as a journalist as i have no objectivity in my writing... :P which is fine by me.

Yoda talk, is still lingering very much in the air I breath in. Hehehe that little green fella is just to cute.

In anycase, in Star Wars, Anakin Skywalker failed and went to the dark side. Not merely because of emotions but also because he failed in hi discipline as a jedi. Personally, i find Star Wars wonderful simply not just cause of the effects but also because of the ethical values it portrays.

Emotions are healthy sure, but they can also be detrimental as shown. He didn't know how to control. But then again if he was really disciplined as he should've been as a jedi he wouldn't have even tried flirting with Padme/Amidala anyway. It was clearly stated that Jedi due to what they train in and how they fight they cannot afford to be be comfortable in the realm of emotions. It is a hard an painful scarficie to be a jedi.

The point is when you have something set out. How long will it be until you lose the conviction to go through with it. Is it always a lip service thing, when we make up our mind to do something? Do we end up forgetting the main reason of why we even started to start of that particular goal?
Yess... i'm running out of topics and thoughts to write...

This was originally suppose to go into "The Siren", sorta like a magazine for communication students but since it has been postponed. Do read on...
___________________________________________________________________

It is a new day and you have much to do. You have
assignments to pass up tomorrow, your exams is starting exactly two days from
now, you have emails you need to read, house chores that need tending to, go to
the gym and after all that you want to catch your favourite program on TV if not at least play with a computer game.

But suddenly it hits you, the end is near. You have only one more week left to live according to doctors. One week from now, you are going to pass away....

No, dear readers it is not a true story. But say if it was, how would you spend your last days on earth? Will you actually tend to all the work you have? Or will you drop everything and visit those you care about? Or will you try to reconcile every single relationship may it be lover, friend or foe?

For me, I will tell you I once made the stupid decision of wanting to go through all the work and complete them. Why ever for? Simply for the silly human satisfaction and peace of mind. But then, it dawned to me, it is ridiculous to want to spend and waste the short time I have left just for something that will not matter anymore. Me getting an excellent grade just before I die will not make any impact or difference. It will become pointless and meaningless.

If one were to ask me again, I will change my answer. The reply I will give this time, all those whom I never got to spend enough time with I will at least see them once more. Those whom I have hurt and offended, I will go to them and tell them I am sorry and ask for their forgiveness. For those whom I love dearly, what ever time I have left will be left solely for them. In other words, I will spend all the time I can to repair and build relationships that will no longer be with me physically.

For me I believe very much, that is not the end of the road when death touches. For it is just an end to a physical being on earth, a shell that will be destroyed. The soul will then move on to a different plane. The land of paradise and an endless horizon, white shores and forever lit. But that is another story.
This article is about the choice you make if you knew you had a short time left to live. But should not that be the same though that can be given to our life all the time. Time on earth as it is, will seem so short when you think about it. All the materialistic values you hold on to will be no longer of value anymore. What is the point of taking a valuable item or a good grade to the grave? Would it not be nicer to pass on knowing there was a positive change from a loss life? Would it not be nice for one to see a smile before all becomes complete darkness? It is your choice of how you make your life in the end.
___________________________________________________________________
To just add a little more, I'm not being sadistic or anything, but it was just that i was going through my documents and figure this might be interesting to put up. ^_^I'm putting it up here for you all to read. Funnily it coincides with now, cause I just finished my assignments and also exams are coming up and also it is part of something that i pondered about this week.

I have fainlly succumb to producing an entry which is entirely commercial sports wise. But i'll make it short as i have stupid assignment and exams to prepare for.

Manchester United, what is wrong with you!!!!??? How could you loose... even though this lament is old but nevermind.. loking at today's paper that says, ferdinang can go from the club is the last straw.

First there is the fight of the take over by UStycoon, Malcolm Glazer who bought te club for bout 8oo million, leaving to my thoughts Man U to be in debt and most likely to sell of their VALUEABLE players if they can't fork out the money if Man U is losing as such. Beckham believes in Glazer thinking he'll do a good job.. He'd better if they actually hope to pay of the debt as well as to improve the team further.

Secondly, how could you lose, this season. Not a single trophy in sight.... argghhhh!!!!! And to ARSENAL!!!!!! Man U was winning all the way, they were defending superbly, Ronaldo (my honey) was the MAN, has was in great and the moves...... sigh...

Thirdly today, papers came out stating that it is likely Ferdinand would either leave because of not agreeing to sign the contract with Man u or he'd be sold... NOooooooo...

I end here for the night...

" Record my lament, list my tears on your scroll are they
not in your record?" Psalms 56:8

What actually constitutes being masculine and being feminine?

Masculinity (taken from www.dictionaary.com)
The quality or condition of being masculine.

From what we have been brought up to know masculinity is anything but weak and girly. It has to be seen as strong, macho, full of testosterone, hard in character...or and moving further...the deep voice, with the buff bod must be the one wearing the pants, will always have it his way, stubborn, and somehow right in the end during some odd situations.

Feminity
Womanliness

What feminity? We have been made to understand, as the feminine, refined, loveable, delicate, tender, soft-spoken, sweet, gentle, caring and understanding....or... the thing in the skirt, which is always whinning away bout something being messy or dirty, and always have to be right....I'm strecthing it. But this is how masculinity and feminity has been viewed in society.

Back in maybe the late 1800s and early 1900s, when a women doesn't have her rights, she will fight for it and will then be considered macho or rough. For a guy it is perfectly normal and even more so that he should do it. These days, females are allowed to voice out their opinion and what matters to them. However, males have always been and always will be scrutinized for being lack of a man if they ever let anyone else put them down, even more so if it happens to be a woman.

Take for example, a girlfriend and boyfriend. The boy is being bugged or bullied by friends and girl stands up for him. Or say if the boy is teased by others and the girl steps in to stop it. For some it does seem heroic that the girl comes in. But for others, that might view the boy as a weakling, the one who is not dominant in the relationship. This in the ends results in further teasing by others. Oh the horror!

Or take a married couple for example. Husband goes out with friends or even office mates. Wife suddenly calls and tells him to bring home something immediately. Husband loyally and obediantly obeys and leaves company he is with to do wife's bidding. If a husband is always dominated by the wife, other men will not take him seriously. I think it is a known fact that male figures when they are overthrowned by the female figure, there seems to be an imbalance if not maybe just a funny feeling that somethins is just off.

Would one say, a male that doesn't show his masculine side, to be more feminine or to be lack of masculine?

To guys what is your view on this? Take the first example of the boyfriend and girlfriend. Would you mind if say your girlfriend did stand up for you? Or it is ok with some rules set down? Or you would not have it at all, as it will make you look as if you are less of a man?

Basically, question to all.. does it just seem a little bit "weird" if a guy is not in control? I know we are in the 21st century and yada yada, but to me, it just doesn't fit in the natural law if guys are not the one in control of..a situation, a relationship..whatever...Girls it is ok, we stil have our independence. Besides as they say, the head may be the man, but there is always one woman who is the backbone. ^_^

Just wanted to put in a poem, also cause i haven't written one for a long while. In regards to two things which spurred me this week. One was a research proposal by a senior i know on why people move away from the church. Second, it is just a person who has a faith which does not seem believable...and just brought disappointment.

Just the other day, i was watching American Idol and i tihnk Nadia was singing. She had chosen a sweet song but comments were given that it didn't real suit much for this competition that is all about how you perform and how good your vioce is. In any case, there was a part she had given her reasons for chosing the song which was because it represented part of her and how she wanted people to see her through that song or soemthing like that.

In anycase, because she said that X has made this conclusion as your ideals are never somethign to be expressed out and also they can never work. Here in this sense, Nadia i suppose gave the impression to my parent that she is an idealist and hope people will see it her way. Sadly the argument here is that this does not agree well with X. He believes that people's ideals should never be mixed with the 'real world. In his sense i would assume it to be the world outside home and into working life. Cause he feels that ideals such as Christianity can never work in an environment outside a church. Which i totally disagree with. I personally believe, ideals of a person can still work but they have to be worked according to the situation and to the environment they are in.

Actually, X's view is that he finds anything to do with God over the extreme and can be too gung ho. I don't see anything wrong withh having a passion for something one loves. Even better that the passion is for God. I can actually argue with X saying then him seeing everything with a money business attitude is also considered over the line. Not everything in life has to deal with money, and gaining respect from people. In fact what does it matter at all if you have all that and not be happy and not have a purpose in the end...

Think about it? Can all ideals be thrown out the window in the supposed 'real' world. Or should ideals or can i be more specific Christian ideals still live in our daily lives and not just inside a church or a religious surrounding? The whole point of learning what is in a Bible is to go out and live it. It may very well not be easy, and whoever said life is suppose to be easy. If life is easy and comfortable, one will never learn, one will never be challenged to be spurred with the difficulties in life.

To my Christian friends, let us encourage one another all the more everyday in our walk in not only our lives but also the walk with Jesus. We need it ever so often, when times seem weak and frail. With that i leave for this day's blogging.

My dear fellow readers, unfortuanately i'm going to be presenting my very unfortunate masculine side....oh dear..

To come about with the second entry on complaint's of being a women, I have thought about it. I had half a mind to discontinue at one point, but now when i think about it. Writting about it is just some sense of making women aware of how ridiculous they can be at times, maybe it may sound more ridiculous since this complaing is coming from a female herself.

Why is women just love to go gossipping behind backs of others? It is a known fact even tot he women themselves, that it just would not do.. further more... it's downright horrible. After speaking with girls naturally, i find that when this matter is actually brought about, they give the excuse that it is to release tension. Women have accumalated tension which usually in my opinion is released by tears. So besides releasing water works, they will then move on to the next best thing, as tearing will just make a puffy face...which is to talk. And naturally what comes out of a woman's mouth as usual.. would be the nagging if not the complaining of what the find to be either annoying, irritating, sexist and the list goes on.

Speaking of tension, i noticed that women naturally have this habit of keeping the past. Why is that so? I dont' know even if i ask myself, cause personally keeping up with particular pasts is bad. Past is past. It is history. However maybe women have this idea that history will repeat itself and therefore they cling on to it, hoping to either revert it or maybe prevent it. Then following that because they try to prevent it too much and nag to much about it, it then causes them stress and disappointment. Women just have this natural habit to keep to it, because of why... memories!!! As much as a memory is beautiful, women tend to like holding on to bad memories as well, even when they know for a fact that it is bad for them to do so. Women have this thing also for when they hav this particular memory, good or bad, they just have to talk about it and make it all dramatic. In fact i've noticed after speaking with other girls, that when i tell thme of a problem that i have, they can actually relate to me with much zest...
I wonder whether is it because they are at the same time actualyl reflecting on something in themselves that also troubles them..

Am I wrong? It can be possible..I'm to saying it is the answer.

And following that, why are women so particular with the little things, that can seem so trivial at times? Or to be more exact, the mushy wushy things. Women.. i admit myself too... are suckers for the sweetness of things in life. The minute someone does something 'genuinely' nice, we
(I'm starting to write we, cause i do not deny i am woman) are hooked, line and sinker. Then after that when it is not done anymore... we just have to whine, saying 'Why don't you do itanymore?" Have i done some thing wrong? or mroe so they then become perasan thinking... ohh he's in to me!?

Oh well that constitutes the complaint's (haha naturally) of a woman today. All men and women are free to rebutt... :P

In regard to some thoughts and debate on the topic....
___________

To answer first to my dear friend:

Even though a lot of people you may know, my dear, does not see it as a bad thing... cause i have to admit even i know a good number... doesn't mean that it is still justified to use them.
Even though they are expressed differently and even though they sound different in a manner, it just doesn't seem appropriate.

My debate still maintains that even though they are words and are considered to be slangs in this modern generation...they are still inappropriate. Probably the world may not agree to it, cause it has been over used extensively in every corner till it has become a norm. But i am no judge to a person as to what they want to use, or more so how they perceive the word to be. Only a thought...

_________


A little history on the word f*** :...

Word History:
The obscenity f*** is a very old word and has been considered shocking from the first, though it is seen in print much more often now than in the past. Its first known occurrence, in code because of its unacceptability, is in a poem composed in a mixture of Latin and English sometime before 1500.

The poem, which satirizes the Carmelite friars of Cambridge, England, takes its title, “Flen flyys,” from the first words of its opening line, “Flen, flyys, and freris,” that is, “fleas, flies, and friars.” The line that contains fuck reads “Non sunt in coeli, quia gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk.” The Latin words “Non sunt in coeli, quia,” mean “they [the friars] are not in heaven, since.”

The code “gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk” is easily broken by simply substituting the preceding letter in the alphabet, keeping in mind differences in the alphabet and in spelling between then and now: i was then used for both i and j; v was used for both u and v; and vv was used for w. This yields “fvccant [a fake Latin form] vvivys of heli.” The whole thus reads in translation: “They are not in heaven because they f*** wives of Ely [a town near Cambridge].”

Now in anycase, after reading what the word itself means. All the more i do not wish to use, as it should not be used. Even to express happiness, sadness, anger, or even just a slang. The word as it is explained in www.dictionary.com, all the descriptions for it are distasteful to the ear if one reads them. Having read them. Now why would one like putting slangs like these into sentences that are meant to be of compliment or of expression.

When you say "My, you are a beautiful person." as compared to "My, you are a f****** beautiful person". When you say something you mean, why impurify it with the slangs. Indirectly it is as though you say angrily to the person or in some perverse mock that she/he is beautiful. It's not about interpretation here, what i type. But more so, it is the fact of the word that it is vulgar.

Too much of the media and post-modernism has caused everything to have a double meaning. Even as something as simple as this. Why does one think then, that that which is supposedly good is actually in truth bad?

Disclaimer: This entry is just voicing out a habit which i just do not prefer.. of myself..and which i think becomes a bad habit of others. It is the truth so bare with me and with this entry. I am sorry if it first of all causes any harm and offence to others. I do not mean for it to do. But i think it is an issue which should actually be resolved in some manner. To just bring a little awareness in ourselves.

Swearing, curses, cusses, obscenities, vulgarities...however you wanna put them or say them, they are still the same. They are all swears.

Personally me as a person, at one point I did not swear. Then after that i was influenced in swearing from reading a book which had the f""" word all over the place. My friend who does swear was shocked because i never swore before that. I shrugged it off at first then later on it hit me. I didn't like the habit. It was foul and uncool, and most of all, it makes a bad impression on me. It would protray me as a person who is unsophisticated, unphased by manners, and just downright rude. I have my points when i do swear at times yes but even so, I do my utmost to never swear and if not to keep it as mild as possible.

People who swear constantly, like rappers or black movies or adult movies or young adult movies. What is it with the love for the curses? Every single sentence that comes out of their mouth is always full of one swear words which leads into chains of swear words until they finally reach what they want to say.
For example:
Normal: What is the problem?
Swearing: What is you @$%&ing #$%@ ^&% of a problem?

As much as when one is angry, I just don't think it neccessary for one to go screaming obscenities at one another to show displeasure. Does it really release tension? Does it give off any benefit in the end to the individual or the people around the individual? When people start swearing in public, one instantly knows there is a disagreement of some kind. Swearing in the end finally ruins the picture for people.

One which i particularly do not like is when they bring in obscenities including God's name. It is a highly respected name which deserves so much praise and adoration and people can just nicely go ahead and use it in blasphemous terms. You are using His name in vain.
Just for example "god d*****t"
How would one like it if instead of putting the name God, try putting in your name, or even your parents name. So it then becomes "James d*****t" or "Ryan d*****t" I am not trying to be funny. I'm trying to point out that these are names which you hold dear to yourselves. So now how bout a name which is divine? Doesn't one think they should burn for having blasphemised in such a manner?
I once asked what is the problem with swearing...after being in with crowds (no pinpointing) of different groups...i finally understand why. Swearing just hurts...and it does not give off any benefit to anyone. The words are harsh and crude.

I give a lot of credit to people who choose not to cuss in public or anywhere. To me it shows maturity, integrity to oneself and and a sign of respect to others no matter who they are.

Let me ask to readers, when one or you swear. Why did you say it? or Who were you saying it too? Was there even a valid reason for you to cuss?

End?
No,the journey doesn't end here..
Death is just another path...
one that we all must take..
The grey rain curtain of this world rolls back..and all turns to silver glass
And then you see it..
White shores...and beyond...A far green country... under a swift sunrise.

That was a beautiful line and it will always be embedded in my memory.

Thank God for salvation..where death has been conquered. And my brothers and sisters...we will see that white shore with the swift sunrise...

Aragorn and the army

I haven't blogged for a while all thanks to assignments and just more assignments.

This partically entry isyet again related with one of the subjects but more so a question my lecturer had posed to us which has rather shaken, if you will, if not made me a little uncomfortable.

History is considered to be made up of many stories all happening at once. Whatever thought, action, event that has happened is past and has become history. We are all ourselves part of that history, whatever it may deemed to be. So now it just so happens most of the time the history that we read now, is a compilation of the 'victors' of history or if not probably people who have made a define mark in the timeline. So if history is made up of many stories all happening at once, which in the end is the real story? Which in the end is the real truth?

Our bible is history itself. I can believe that it is dejure (by right) to be truth. But the question which given, has somehow blurred that understanding. Everything is a history and so is the bible and we know it is truth, so how does one as a Christian defend that statement. The bible is history but it is the ultimate truth.

Now this has gotten me shaken, as the thought maybe just scares me a little. But i'm willing and very much eager to hear other people's thoughts on this.

Of late, i have noticed, i may not be losing a person i know physically but it is brought to my attention of the amounts of deaths that suddenly has come around in the recent year or years. Friends whom have lost loved ones and all of them painful.

Just yesterday i read through a friend's email regarding a friend's suicide act. She didn't know the person very well, yet she felt the pain to lose a person known. I've only had one case where i lost a person i knew. I didn't know him well either but i knew him through a friend of mine. He was my friend's boyfriend..and he had died in a car accident. I didn't cry, but the shock was there and even not knowing him, there was a sense of lost, grief and pain.

It saddens me much when I hear of the death of a person, and i honestly do not know what to do at times. The other day just this year, another friend of mine just lost a friend she knew very well. She was just speaking with him a few days before and he was mentioning to her he'll come by and see her to hang with her. Few days after that, i was with her when she got a phone call, that he had passed away in an accident. She couldn't cry at the moment, she was in too much pain. But later on the tears came and she felt so much grief...

Then just recently this year, a friend of mine from uni had lost her father to a gunshot. Even though she had the company of loved ones and friends, i'm disappointed that i wasn't there to comfort her enough.

I have not seen death at any door of my friends and therefore i do not know the ultimate lost and pain that one would feel. My friend had mentioned in her email to fully appreciate those that are around us now. These are the same words of another friend of mine who lost loved ones last year as well.

Those passed on will not be with us pyhsically anymore, but they are always with us in our memories. We should be even more joyous, when we know that they have received the Lord into their hearts, the consolation is that even though we lose them here, we will still see them again in Heaven with the Father. We are again victorious even in death, for it does not bind us anymore.

I must say, at the beginning of my semester, i started with much vigour in being very interested in the topics. I truthfully and sincerely am interested in them, for they are not so much on communication itself.. despite.. it being called 'bach. in communication', but more so on humanities and social science.

I am still a freshie in terms of my faith, but that is another story. Two of my subjects entitled; Communication research and methodology, and authorship and criticism poses a lot of theories that makes one question the faith they believe in. Doesn't matter what faith it is, all faiths are questioned and challenged in the authorship class.

We're now goign into what is an author and how they have changed over the years since the enlightenment period to the post-structuralist and post-modernist view.

Let me see if i can do my lecturer justice by describing what is an author. What has been perceived to be an author, are people who not only just write, but people who are able to bring forth a story to life through their own feelings. Hmm.. A person who writes against what is potrayed or a norm in society mostly that of the English ideology, showing originality, to be considered a genius. The author is the epitome of that which is refined and sophisticated.. yada yada yada..

There was one i statement i could not help but disagree with. We learnt that the author, a person who has written text is no longer considered original or alive anymore. Whatever that is written these days is just a copy, improvisation, or a thought of another thought. The subconsciousness of the author takes over and then what is written could be not directly what is meant by the author but by his inner feelings.

The latter, death of an author, rather meaning that the person who writes his works, is actually not the one doing so, but rather the language takes over the person. I can't help but disagree with it, because then what about the Bible that is read? The author i beleive is to be God, because it is His Word. But if an author is dead then in the end, there really is no God. Of course one can argue that the Bible is written by humans and not by God directly Himself. But then again it is said it is inspired by God...

2 Timothy 3:16
All Scripture is Godbreathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness...

So if the Word is God, so how can they say that the author is dead and language has taken over. Then can that mean that 'nothing' has actually created the meaning? I think not.. and i think i'm rambling. I just can't accept the post-structuralist way. It is so harsh and i think it relates quite a bit with relativism, the idea all systems and beliefs go, as long as it is good for you.

Another thing i just can't agree with is how they question on our very selves. As in everything around us.. all institutions build us up. So if you were to take the analogy of yourself as an onion. The outer skins of that onion are what you believe in to be your original self. But in the end if you were to think about it, try peeling away all that you beleive in because it's not really from you but from things that influence you. Then you are actually nothing!!!?? Just like the onion which in the end has no core. Sigh.. stupid analogy. So we are actually nothing, our selves don't exist, we have no purpose cause we are just built up from other things.

The last time i faced that statement it was last year, i didn't know what it means to have a purpose. This time i faced it again just this week, and instead i really questioned. Am I believing just for the sake of believing? Or is because God is really real in my life? I choose the latter for my reasons. God is real and He is very much alive. PRAISE GOD!

In anycase i'm just saying that i can't agree with the posts stuff even if i am living in it. Hehehe i'm retaliating.

Before it all began,
Before it all made sense,
Before every single prayer,
Before every single plea,
Before my very breath..

You knew how it would start,
You knew how it would finish,
You heard before I cried,
You heard before I thought,
You created me and moulded me..

It all began with You,
Your Love, Your Grace, Your Mercy,
Your Word!

prayer 

It was brought to me actually just as a statement from a friend. "God had placed two trees in the Garden of Eden." From there it had ventured out into a question of why was it placed there to begin with. I discussed about it with my better half, and this is what i concluded.

In the beginning, God had placed two trees. The Tree of Life and the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. The reason he placed the two trees there was for the human race, the people he had created to worship to FALL! Yes my brothers and sisters. Adam took the fruit from the forbidden tree so that we may fall.

Now why are we suppose to fall? It is because of the person who started sin to begin with. Satan! he was the creature that began sin where there was none to even fall too. he is what one calls the primary sin, the sinner of all sinners. Being the worship leader of heaven, Lucifer the angel then, just had to have the glory be to him, and not to his creator. The sin that we hold is secondary, not pure sin. For before eating the fruit, men were considered innocent. Lucifer was deemed as innocent once too, but then in heaven there was nosuch thing as the tree of knowledge of good and evil, there was only good. God didn't place any evil, but Lucifer turned evil naturally, thus becoming satan.

Unlike us humans we are not aware of the sin we do.
"Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. - Luke 23:34"
Satan on the other hand was conscious of the sin that he was doing. he knew he was retaliating against God.

It is due to that, God wanted to create the perfect beings to worship Him, and for all His glory. So He created man, and allowed him to fall short from His glory so that he will know how to choose between God and himself (evil). In this manner, man already knows about evil, the ways of evil and the result of evil = death. However man chooses to walk the path towards God and it is from there the mindset, priveileges and purposes all change. It is now all done for God and not for the man's self. Man will then refuse the ways of evil, when he leads God's people in the coming revelation. It is said in the bible, men will be given power and worlds to rule when we come to God's kingdom. But God wanted to make sure we help lead the people in the right manner.

So to conclude, God placed the two trees so that those chosen to help lead Him, :in the kingdom of Zion, will be prepared for the pains of the world and never fall short from God's glory. That is the purpose of the two Trees. To prevent sin from forming in heaven again.

I would call us as the new angels of worship to God. Where an angel had fallen, we are the ones to replace those that had fallen, along together with the other original angels. We are more than just angels then. We are ultimately God's people!

O, my Father,
How glorious Thy art,
For Thee has saved my worthless soul,
Wait not I can for Thy glory to behold.

Long do I for Thy kingdom,
Eagerly I wait for the Day,
When humanity and the world will fade away,
For that is the Day I return to Thee.

Amen!Amen!Amen!

This was originally a draft but i've decided to finally put it up.

Just yesterday, i was helping my lil sis out with a maths question. She is now doing circles and angles, where it involves knowing the basic angles when lines are drawn in a circle. Anyhow to not get mathematical cause i wouldn't know how to explain it without a diagram let alone in simple english. I said to her i won't help you for this question because it is easy, and the diagram is staring back at you in the face,it is very clear what the answer for the angle is if you know how to look at the diagram in the right way.

Sometimes i wonder whether that's how we look at life. We can know the basics, but in the end is our life like that diagram which we just can't seem to understand? Or despite knowing the basics we just can't be bothered to engage in further thoughts about them and how to put them into practise? Like how my sister knew the basics that was taught to her, but her mind either refuses to think or just can't comprehend the beauty of how the final answer is related with everything she has already learnt.

The simple stuff are easy to decipher because in the math examples they are all spread out and neatly written to just focus on the particular formula or question.
Take for example algebra. Usually what we look for is the "x" in a question given.
eg.
1. 4x = 8
x = 2

2. 4x + 6 = 26
4x = 20
x = 5

3. x² = 4
x = √4
x = 2

Very simple and straight forward. But now if you were to include other ways or even combine all the questions up above, then the answer becomes harder to find. Consider now a math question like so.

(x² + √36)(4x - 29)x = 158
x = ?

I'm not going to do the calculation for the last question. But ultimately in the end you will get on definate answer. In maths anyway you always get one absolute answer. Because all the methods or deductions point to only one answer.

But when placed with other questions on angles she just couldn't make conclusion of how to get the answer. Is that how we are sometimes as well? Are we so surrounded by too much influences from the media that we can't seem to focus anymore or even know how to differentiate from that which is real or fake or true and untrue?

Now say if we were to replace the "x" with the word truth. Then we can look at it in the same way. There is only one truth and only one way isn't it. The other numbers and symbols next to the "x" can be considered as external input that just makes the "x" more difficult to understand, comprehand and also to finally conclude.
If truth was anything like maths, there would be one answer. Naturally in a Christian view, we can say that truth is God. He is our big picture that we have to come to see.

So now i would like to believe that everyone else out there, is pretty much like the person doing the math question. Everyone is trying to figure out what is truth and what is it they are missing in life. Along the way they have other input to help them finally come to a conclusion of their own. But in the end is that conclusion of "x", the real answer? It could just be part of the steps to getting to "x" but some would think they already have all the answers to life in their hands. Pretty much like the post-modernistic time we are living in now, where science is believed to answer all that questions. It should also be noted that the supernatural can't be answered by science alone.

Our biggest picture and biggest truth, lies in the hands of our Father in heaven. Need i say more?

I should have stated this at the beginning of my blogging days.

Before i begin my good people, i just want to state that the text you read here is for you. Whether you wish to read it and how you interpret it is entirely up to you. Whatever that is here, is not about my thoughts and my life events, but my observation on a few things that comes along my way. What is put here is what i think seems to be either of amusement, funny, or worthy to be blogged.

Now having made a title such as the above, people would think that i have renounced my gender.

I have often defended the behaviours of women, as naturally i am one. But now it is time i come to face facts and see that our behaviour is not at all appealing at times, if one where to think about it. I have noticed that there are a few things in men that actually do make them more the dominant of the two genders. Which is how God intended it to be. But due to post-modernism, there has to be the battle of the sexes as to which gender is better.

Females have always told their male counterparts, that they can never be understood because females are just too complexed, yet simple at the same time. How contradicting and paradoxing is that? Females are just complex and that's that. Not both. Men are really like how they say are the ones to be simple and that is true. Tkae a look, when men say one thing, the natural instinct for a women is to find the 'hidden meaning' in their sentence. When truthfully, there is no hidden meaning. What the male says is one passive sentence, one way and there's nothing to read between the lines. However for a woman, they have hidden meanings in their lines. And they expect the males to figure it out when they are truthfully blur. Has anyone noticed that when males joke, they talk in secret codes? Yeah wel goes the same for the women and how they talk. The men aren't women so don't you think it is time that they should stop trying to make the men talk like them?

Following that, comes the good ol' habit of females to assume and to think negatively. Why bother assuming when it only gives personal conflict as well as conflict with the others around you? Men do not assume, they are just plain well either blur or that are sure of themselves. That's a good point actually. It is due to this, i can make the statement, therefore thats why females are actually insecure. And require a good amount of security from time to time. Females when they assume they start to think of the bad stuff that could happen. Doesn't that just bring about a headache? Why do you think they tend to end up b****ing about one another? Doesn't matter whether it is foul language or not. Rather immature and sad really.

Women, say they are the more matured gender. How much of that is true. I have actualy begun questioning that thought for a while now. Sadly it can't be said that women are because women have a big factor that plays with them constantly and it is called EMOTIONS! They allow emotions to play with their being and thus it can cause them to do the uncalled for, unrational, and the wrong things. I'm not saying men don't have it, but it is more prominent in females.

Rather women, should remove the unrational parts of themselves, to a more matured state of mind, that is why God gave us a brain to begin with. Perhaps then, the battle of the sexes can finally stop and there would not be anymore miunderstandings and conflict.

Hmm.. should women complain about not being the main one on top? Did not God give the bigger responsibilities to the man. Women are meant to be the helpers. So why not be that helper and not the problem maker?

Science seeks to know more and more about less and less until it knows everything about nothing.

Philosophy seeks to know less and less about more and more until it knows nothing about everything.

How many of you can agree with these...statements? Or just this line for that matter?

I buy the first one, in where science is meant to find out more about something, until all has become revealed. But where philosophy seeks to know less about more? I feel it contradicts.

First let us understand what is philosophy. A combination of two greek words. Philo means love and sophia means wisdom. Hence you get philosophy = the love of wisdom. The meaning base on www.dictionary.com = "The rational investigation of questions about existence and knowledge and ethics; Investigation of the nature, causes, or principles of reality, knowledge, or values, based on logical reasoning rather than empirical methods."

To not get to studious here. Already it explains that philosophy is the 'investigation' of the subjects stated above, then how can it be considered to be knowing less and less. If one loves wisdom, how can they seek to know less as compared to knowing more. In other words i don't agree with the statement on philosophy, stating in the end they know nothing about everything.

Maybe if one were to make the statement "That person has his own philosophy", and if that philosophy to begin with is rather premature and nothing, then yes you can say that philosophy for 'that' person is redundant and he knows nuts about anything. Ok so fine maybe my opinion here is rather shallow.. feel free to sue me.

Philosophy is considered to be the irrational and science the rational, because it claims to be objective since they do not involve theology or the mercy feelings for the perceiver. Does tha tmean we think therefore we are considered to be irrational? If anything, we think and therefore we become logical and rational because it involves everything, from facts to the human feelings. Science however diregards human faith, emtion and thought, so actually they are not really objective either..just int he discoure of science they are considered to be. They've put up a barrier that goes "Ok that is theological, we won't have that kinda talk while we do our rational and serious research." Philosphers questions and answers base on their surroundings and the relationships around them. Science is more of an empirical structure.

My whole point? Well i don't know .. maybe it's because i'm thinking less and less now on more and more of the subject therefore, i have come up with no point.

I'll say this. Science may fail when there is no one to think up of the theory,philosophy will fail when no one continues thinking of the theory. Science without philosophy is lame, philosophy without science is blind.

Silent...
When is it best to be?
Silence...
Whom for is it best?

Do thou dare refrain,
from sounding any noise?
Do thoue think thou can,
afford not any sound?

To speak, better is it
Or worse is it when thoue do?
Hold back the temptation,
restrain thyself from wars..

Wise be when thee utter,
words from thy mouth,
try not to stutter,
broken will be what thou mean.


Sigh ramblings yet again... of just something going through my head wish i would rather refrain from saying out loud...

Get a grip girl and go back to work...

How sad I be,
that I may have to,
speak to myself,
over through my own blog...

Back to work... back to work.. :P

Well well, the day has finally come where i have now gone back to my schedule of studying. But then again, my schedule itself sort of allows me to relax a little.

3 day weekend, only four classes and most not at an early hour.. how nice...

In any case, my first subject today and only subject for that matter deals with philosophy, critique and some mad hatters. The lecturer whom, i feel has a rather quirky side and yet somewhat appealing by nature, mentioned that we will have to get out of our comfort zone, or more so mindsets that we have been instilt with since young or what not.

Basically in this subject we are required to critique on particular issues and not look at them in a way the world would see them... Hmm i can say it reminds me very much of the line from the bible..."Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.."

Much of media studies so far..reminds me of not conforming to the practical ways that have been deemed to be allright by society. We go along with the flow of each action or way, but we rebel them with the different principles that we hold, if not possibly the different ideas or ideals that we have come to embrace.

On top of that he also mentioned how we are required to question the books, or theories that we will now face in our subject. Reminds me yet again of another thing which i read in my unfinished "great divorce"...sigh...The part on where there was a character who pretty much i gather as a philosopher, a thinker, a questioner. In the subject today, my lecturer commented that ther is no right or wrong answer, further more when we start writing our essays, our conclusions brings us to another conclusion....that there is no fixed conclusion...The philosopher in my "Great Divorce" had mentioned to another character in the book how he will always be questioning, cause he feels there will never be a final answer for anything. Is that really so? In anything there will not be any final answer?

I guess i have to look at it in its own context. Maybe in this sense there won't be any final answer, regarding the subjecy "Authorship and Criticism". No such thing as a final answer.. I don't think that possible. When putting faith and everything else involves God, you can always be sure that there is a final answer in the end. But will you be choosing the right answer? The right path way? Choices, choices and intrusions into the mind...

My my i'm rambling...anyways back to work now.

It's been a while since i updated.. yes i am aware...

It has come to a point where i can finally take a rest...meaning....

MY UNIVERSITY SCHEDULE HAS STARTED.

Call me a killhoy, but i have just finished one of the longest holidays ever..minusing the 6 month break after A levels. This is the second longest. So i would just like to say i am going to enjoy going back to studying.

Even more so because, i know people who are soon to be graduating from their university days. It is going to be a new journey for my fellow friends and new experiences to walk along the way.

The stage of studying in a class is over for them. No more rushing for classes in the morning, trying to figure out their class regime, no more trying to rush for assignment deadlines, no more cramming at night or burning the midnight oil,... no more socializing with friends you hav emade close bonds with. It is going to be a joyful and sad time all at once.

So i am still in univeristy life..the second year to be exact.. starting in another 3 days and 15 hours more or less. Because of the friends i know who are finishing and leaving their uni life. I have come to yearn more for my studying lifehood. The seniors will be steppign out into a new sphere now. The working atmosphere. Some would have some experiences, others would not. But more so they will face new stresses in life. Its jsut another phase to go through.

My graduating day will come soon.. well not anytime soon, but they will come in the coming future. No more will i be a student. and finally the minute i start working, i can come out of the shell i call home sweet home. I would then see whether i can prove myself, my family and friends, wrong by being able to survive on my own. More so myself. Let Gods will on my life be done.

Until then... i'm going to enjoy what i ahve left of my studying days. And the people who surround me everyday.

Ok fine so my quick thought turned out to be a long one...Sue me. ^_~

As shown below, i have just written a poem of sort about a gift which i had received on the special and over commercialised day called Valentine's Day. But it's stil a special special day for me.

In anycase, as much as i found the outing to be simple yet memorable, and even more unforgettable to be the gift. I remind myself every once in a while now since i received it, that it's not so much the gift itself, the materialisticness, that is important but more so the one has given it to you. The gift is without a doubt the most beautiful thing i've ever seen and i'm very honoured to receive it.

I probably write this is because the thing about gifts these days is that at least someone out there in the world has the exact same one that you do. For some that can be a real dissappointment as 'gifts' then tend to loose their specialness. True in some sense. Like the real Evenstar in the LOTR, there was only one Evenstar through out the land and that made that item very precious and unique. It symbolized Arwen's beauty, and love for the mortal man Aragorn. But after going through many sites online, one where you can purchase evenstar online, it's like well not as unique as the real one.

But i don't want to place all the importance on to object gift cause i fear that i will turn the evenstar into the likeness of the ring in LOTR. Doubtly maybe but it is possible for me to keep on going "my precciiouuuss" of my evenstar.

The point i want to make is that the important part was being GIVEN it. The act of giving and receiving. That was the special part. For that is where it can't be taken away, unlike the object which can be taken away. There's nothing bigger than to give something away which means so mch to you. To receive it then turns into a blessing for the other party.

Sigh.... after a while of doing nothing but looking at the prospects, chemical constituents and botanical physiology of plant, i know remember why i didn't like chemistry. And why i had decided to drop it years ago.

What's to know about a veggie. I'm sorry but in the end the most i can conclude is that they are as usual good for health because God made them edible for us. The details of why they are good for health..... i don't really bother......not unless it were like the cartoon, with evil tomatoes jumping all over the place then ok fine, i don't mind getting into the details to destroy the horrible red monsters. (But i do happen to like eating tomatoes..essential for the skin ^_^)

Anyways, This is just to vent on section of my irritation to the vegetables i'm reseraching on. But i wil say i found interesting things in the midst of researching.

There's the only punishment i can think of. And tomorrow i shall envoke my stomach, call upon the silvery aid, bring forth the shield of 'china' and i shall then cast my wrath upon the green things. I shall EAT THEM!! muahahahahahahhahaa!!!!

Need sleep...
ZZZzZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZ.........